WHFB: The Portal of Kittens & Return of the Jim


Byakhee Jim has been away for a while, but returned yesterday at a rather short notice WHFB game.

So we had a 2k point game of Warhammer, he was playing Orcs & Goblins, and I as ever was playing Dark Elves.

Stone thrower, bolt thrower, herd of squigs, two huge Goblin archer units, some Orcs,a boar chariot, goblin wolf riders and 2 snotling pump wagons. OH and his general on a Wyvern.

Warlocks, RXBs x2, Silver Talons, Spitty the Hydra, CoK, and two CoK Chariots.

I wasx baffled by his deployment, and he all but admitted it was a bit of a mess. He won initiative, and promptly hid his General behind a snotling pump wagon that also was, not quite running away from its initial deployment. We had a chat and agreed, that the deployment of heroes, specifically Orc generals on Wyverns was one of those interminable mysteries. The models look really good, but in game terms are mostly a liability.

The wolf riders, using the vanguard move, outflanked me, causing me to have to redeploy huge amounts of my army. So Jim was quite pleased. This later turned out to be a hollow victory, as it spread his forces way too thin.

Unlike last game, I shifted all my units into an aggresive attack mode, pimping them up with augment spells. For various reasons, Jim’s goblin shamans either failed to cast spells, blew themselves up, or were otherwise ineffectual in the magic phase.

That said, my Warlocks had rto race around and reposition themselves, using the Portal of Kittens as cover (long story).

Goblin models treated with contempt – as I commented, Byakhee Richard would have a fit with models being poured on to the table like this.

With a banner of swiftness, the Silver Talons charged the Orc Archers in turn two, even a goblin fanatic released from a neighbouring Goblin unit failed to stop them, and crunch time happened.

Now you see them, now you don’t.

Faced with a wall of Cold One Knights, the Goblin wolf riders dodged round them and behind the rest of my army.

Unfortunately, they then encountered my Sorceress, who unleashed Blade Wind on them in the magic phase. they then failed their leadership test and fled the battlefield. Adios 21 wolf riders ! Leaving Spitty with a lump in her throat.

This eliminated the threat of envelopment, and allowed my CoK to let loose.

A goblin shaman bravely (?) unleashed a great spell using about 5 power dice, and promptly made a mess of things. The spell didn’t go off. By now, I had rolled NO dispel dice by turn three.

As you can see the Shaman, didn’t last long, he wasn’t even a speed bump by the time the RXBs had riddled him with bolts.

The Silver Talons steamed through the Orc Archers, and followed up onto a pump wagon, only to get side charged by the Orc General on Wyvern. A challenge later, a wounded orc General defeated Samartik my Hero. But, my unit held. In the same turn, my Sorceress, zapped the second Goblin archers unit, again with Blade Wind, and wiped out 31 of them. ! Naturally a failed panic test later and they were running away.

It wasn’t going all my way. The Portal of Kittens, spewed force magicks, and injured both my unit of Warlocks and the Squig hoppers, but not enough to stop them meeting in combat, and they defeated my Warlocks – at a price.

The Silver Talons defeated the Pump Wagon and Orc General in the second round of combat, causing the the General to flee way beyond the artillery on the hill. They restrained pursuit, until an Orc Boar Chariot decided a sideswipe from the two CoK Chariots was not advisable and hoved into view.

The CoK, had meanwhile, redirected their charge from the boar chariot, onto the goblin host, losing a knight on the way in, they duy proceeded to trash the goblins for another couple of casualties. The goblins being steadfast, stood there and took it. Unfortunately, allowing themselves to be side charged by the CoK Chariots.

In the meantime, the squig hoppers charged a unit of RXBs, and all but wiped them out, causing me a bit of concern, but with with Spitty and the Sorceress to hand I was confident of dealing with them. The second and last remaining pump wagon took a leisurely tour of the field and harmed no -one.

By now however, the game was over and Jim conceded defeat:

  • This was a very long game for 2k – taking between 12.30 and 5pm to play;
  • Jim, having not played for more than 6 months needed to be reminded of a lot of rules;
  • though as he admitted sadly, he could remember the page numbers of certain rules;
  • his random deployment completely blindsided me – I had no way of developing a strategy to cope with his lack of strategy;
  • he got unlucky on a couple of rolls;
  • I came packing for certain stuff, as did he, but my prognostications turned out better for once;
  • Blade Wind is a horrible spell to be on the end of in large units for example;
  • I still made mistakes, but an aggressive stance certainly suits a Dark Elf army.

Obligatory Cat photo – yes, I must have been inspired by Black Jack’s Satanic powers. Actually, the two cats were remarkably absent from the room for the day. They gave Jim “the Evils” but eventually recognised him.

Jim also had to deny his Tortoises had anything to do with the fire at their hosts’ house whilst he was away. šŸ˜‰

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: