AVBCW 2013 04 13: The Battle of Much Marcle Ridge I

Incoming News Reports from Much Marcle !

Loyal British subjects of HRH King Edward will be heartened to hear that BUF elements under the command of Captain Arrowsmith have thwarted a dastardly plan by disloyal criminal elements in Herefordshire.

Their assault on the Radio wireless transmitter at the top of Much Marcle Ridge were defeated.

In addition, these disloyal criminal elements recklessly planted bombs in the local farmhouse and adjacent barn in an attempt to cause death and injury to Captain Arrowsmith who was temporarily billetted at the farm, his staff with absolutely no regard for farmer Giles and his extensive family of cats. (Domestic cats, not large felines like Abysinnian Lions, which are still at large near the Malverns)

Luckily the bomb in the farmhouse planted by these shoddy amateurs failed to explode, but the one planted in the barn did explode.

Farmer Giles, who had only recently renovated the barn was dismayed to see it go up in flames, along with many poor innocent new lambs who were burnt to death alive in the raging inferno.

Asked what he thought of the Anglicans and their allies, he wisely articulated the phrase that they should:

Get orf moi land

…whilst brandishing a shotgun. (Reporters assume it was only accidentally being waved at them)

A whip round amongst the BUF troops raised enough money for a job lot of mint sauce to ensure the roast lamb did not go to waste.

More details to follow.

Meanwhile reports are coming in of a simultaneous assault on the Westons Cider brewery…